Dear Dean,
Hi, this is your mom.
That little statement is one I have waited years to say out loud. I want you to know one extremely important detail about my life — I could not have prayed for a more precious gift than you. Your arrival in my life is the greatest blessing and being your mother is my highest calling. I am so thankful God gave me you.
As I write this letter I can feel your soft movements, becoming more persistent by the day, and I know soon I will have to share you with the world.
That thought both exhilarates and frightens me.
I wonder what color blue your eyes will shift to and if your hair will be dark and curly like your father’s or platinum blonde like mine as a child. I wonder if you’ll inherit your dad’s love for tinkering or my passion for travel. Will you be shy and studious or silly and courageous or a mix of everything in-between? Will you… will you… will you?
There are no wrong answers, but the infinite possibilities of the man you are to become are a constant thread of thought in my mind. And though I am excited to witness each stage of your growth, I know the time will pass quickly.
Yet here, at this moment, I want to remember each emotion that I feel — the excitement, the fear, the pride, the uncertainty, the joy, and, most dominantly, the love.
When I think of you, love is the overwhelming emotion I feel each day. I love that God chose me to be your mother. I love your father and his partnership as we enter parenthood together. And most importantly…
I love you.
So, as you move within me and your arrival ticks closer and closer, I cling to that emotion above all else, knowing that love will grow with each passing day after we meet face-to-face.
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